Connections for Abused Women and their Children

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Mother with children

Verbal & Emotional Abuse

Some definitions: Verbal assaults, manipulative and or controlling behaviors toward a partner which cause that person to feel afraid, confused, overwhelmed, threatened, powerless, crazy, inadequate, frustrated, or rejected.

The purpose of the verbal assaults and manipulations is to gain and maintain power over the partner. Forms of verbal and emotional abuse include, but are not limited to:

  • name-calling

  • making jokes at partner's expense

  • yelling

  • accusing

  • blaming

  • criticizing

  • threatening

  • refusing to talk

  • making degrading remarks

  • arguing

  • put-downs

  • judging

  • demanding

  • ordering a partner to do something

  • minimizing things that are important to the partner
  • denying previous abusive words and behaviors

  • withholding money and resources

  • withholding affection

  • harassing

  • using "power privilege"

  • stalking

  • playing mind games

  • intimidating looks and actions

  • gestures

  • forcing a partner to act against her will

  • interfering with partner's right to determine her own behavior

  • interfering with partner's/family well-being

  • using the children to carry derogatory messages to partner

  • isolation


  • destroying pets or property